just wanted to share this

I heard this on Joyce Meyer this morning. What an awesome quote. This is very much what I have learned through this whole ordeal.
‎"The only way you KNOW what you believe, is when it is tested. The only way your faith is going to grow, is to go through a time when you have to use it." Joyce Meyer

seeing some improvements

I have been doing the treatments now for about 6 weeks, and I am noticing a pretty drastic improvement. I still have a lot of symptoms, but I can definately tell that the yeast is dying off and I am healing. My face is beginning to get clear and I have so much more energy than I have had in a long time. My skin is very itchy and my hands are very broken out in the yeast rash, but this is a common symptom of candida die off. That should heal and my body fights the yeast off. My sinuses are getting much better as well and the post nasal drip is improving. I use my netti pot or sinus rinse 2 times a day, which is a HUGE help for me. If I do not use my sinus rinse, I get plugged up very quickly. There is still a long way to go, but the treatment is working, and that is so encouraging!

Lexi is starting the medication, Nystatin, that I am on as well. Her head is still a mess and she is still breaking out in the skin lesions randomly. She also looks very pastey to me alot and has dark circles under her eyes. She clears her throat alot too. The diet alone seems to be helping her symptoms to improve somewhat, but the dr doesnt think the diet alone will be enough to fix the problem, because she has so many symptoms that I do. The good news is that our dr is awesome and he lets me be the ginuea pig. So, Lexi doesnt have to go through all of the pokes and such to be tested. He is sure she has a yeast overgrowth, based on the mold exposure and the fact that I do, and her symptoms are parallel to mine. So, I feel so relieved that she doesnt have to go through that.....at least not now. In the future, if she needs the allergy shots and candida shots that I am taking every 5-7 days, then she would need testing. Hopefully, that is never needed. If it is though, I am getting darn good at giving shots....so at least by then I will have experience!
I was watching Joyce Meyer the other day and she looked at the tv screen and said "In the name of Jesus Christ, BE HEALED." Thank you for that message, God. I know we will be healed. I know that Christ is working here and I know that we are being healed. It may be a long process, but we will triumph. We will reach that point where we are no longer having symptoms every day. Sometimes we have to wander around in the desert for awhile, trusting God and leaning on Him and Him alone, before we reach the promised land. :)

RESULTS came in

They dr just called and said that my CT scan came back fine. So, that is a relief!!

still waiting

Well, they told me that I would have news about my CT scan within 48 hours...and most likely more like 24 hours. 48 hours was at 9am this morning, and it is now 1pm. I am a little frustrated that I still do not know anything, but I hope to know soon. I am thinking though, that since I have not heard, the news cannot be THAT bad. Even if they found something, surely it is not too horrible. I will post as soon as I know something. Thanks for the prayers. Keep em coming! I was watching tv on Wednesday night, after my CT scan. I was feeling a little nervous and I said a prayer for God to be with me and to heal me. I decided to tune into an episode of Joyce Meyer (I record her every morning and watch her later). I randomly pulled up an episode and began to watch. The entire show was about health and relying on God. IT was about waiting on God. Joyce said, that waiting on God literally means to EXPECT God. To EXPECT him to do something. I know that I was meant to see that show. It instantly gave me peace and it spoke to me. I know that it was a message that God was sending ot me, through Joyce. At the end of the program, she said a prayer and she said "in the name of Jesus Christ, be healed." I know that we will be healed through all of this. I know that we are on the road to recovery. How long that road is, I dont know. But I know that God is on the road with us :)

God never gives us more than we can handle. Should I take this as a complement?

I want to ask for a favor. A favor of prayers. I dont really know what is going on at the moment, but Saturday night, I started having this weird pulsating in my chest. I blew it off at first and thought it was just another yeast die off symptom. A few hours later, the pulsating was visible, and I can feel it very strongly inside my body as well. It goes with my heart beat. I read online that yeast die off can cause heart palpatations, so I just assumed that was what it was. Well, today, it was still doing it. I went to the dr and they checked me over for hours. They think there is a slight possiblity that I could have an aortic aneurysm. That would be extremely rare for someone at my age and my health....but because of the mold and the systemic fungal infection that I have, it is possible. I must say, I am a little freaked out. I am trying not to think the worst, but the mom in me definately worries. Not so much about me, but my kids, if the worst would be the case. The mom in me always starts worrying about my kids.....If that would be the case, I will be looking at surgery. I am supposed to have a CT scan and possibly an ultrasound also, tomorrow to determine what is going on. I would appreciate prayers from anyone who would offer a prayer.

The Why's and What if's....

I heard a really good sermon at church today, and lt lead me to post this blog post. The sermon was about trusting in God through times of trial and suffering. I know that I have thought alot about this over the last year. The sermon really hit home, and it really made me want to use this whole mold experience to help others, even more than I already did. The sermon started off talking about the phrase that everyone throws around "everything happens for a reason". That saying really doesnt help people when they are going through trials and suffering. If anything, it might make them angry. "Everything happens for a reason".....huh? What reason? When someone is going through pain and suffering, the last thing they need is some useless man made quote "everything happens for a reason". The preacher went on to say what the Bible says about these types of situations. It really hit home because the sermon was exactly my experience in the last year. Everything that he was saying, was exactly what I have been thinking to myself this last year. I grew so tired of hearing "everything happens for a reason." Everyone I knew was saying that. WHAT? Everything happens for a reason? What REASON? For what reason did we loose our home and almost all of our belongings? For what reason were we having health issues? What reason were we loosing everything we knew, and for awhile, our sanity. For what reason? The quote, "everything happens for a reason", frankly, ticked me off! Over time, and after alot of prayer and reflection, I learned exactly what the sermon was saying today. I learned that God is there....and God is trying to work for good. God is working to take a terrible situation, and turn it into something good. I know that when you are facing toxic mold, the worry can consume. There are so many things to think about, and so many things that are unknown. Every little unexplained illness or bump or bruise on my children, leads me to worry. I found myself, and still find myself at times, thinking "why...". I finally had to come to the conclusion that there is no WHY. Things happen in this life. Crappy things. Terrible things.....things way worse than what I have dealt with are happening to someone else....and to another person, something even worse is happening. Things happen. Everything happens. Wont it be nice one day when we are in Heaven and nothing like that ever happens again!? The thing that I had to come to realize, through alot of prayer and reading my Bible, is that things happen. As the preacher said this morning, EVERYTHING happens. And....EVERYTHING happens, to ALL people. Even "good" people. Even believers. Through those things, God is there. God is there. No matter what the problem, He is there....and He is so good. :) I cannot possibly describe the comfort that can bring when you are facing a terrible situation. Not only did I have a lot of WHY questions, but I had alot of WHAT IF questions and thoughts. Those questions were the worst. When holding my sleeping children, and looking at them, I felt sick to my stomach because of all of the "what if" questions flying through my brain. I found myself thinking "what if there is something terribly wrong? What if they seem to be doing ok, but the skin lesions and symptoms are really clues to there being something terribly wrong. What if we are headed to St. Jude soon because our children develop cancer after being exposed to that horrible stuff. What if something happens to me....and my children must face that? What if, what if, what if." I could go on and on with the what if questions that I have thought. One day, I was reading my Bible, and I had a light bulb come on. I read a verse, that became a lifeline to me through this whole ordeal, from that moment on. "Trust in the Lord with all of your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all of your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path." (Proverbs 3:5-6). I read those words, and I started to cry. God was speaking to me....and He was telling me that it was going to be ok. No matter what happend....it was going to be ok. Does that mean everything is going to go just as I want it? No....but it does mean that this will bring about good. At that moment, I decided that I was not going to worry about this anymore. To worry is to not trust God. To worry is to say to God that I do not think He has control....and I do not trust Him. I had to let that worry go. I asked God to take this.....take this burden and take this pain. I asked Him to help me. I asked Him to protect my chlidren, myself, and my husband. I asked Him to lead me to the drs to get the necesarry testing to help us. I asked Him to let me use this oppertunity to reach out to others and to help others. I asked Him to help me to share this story and to help others see Gods love for them, through this situation. If this story helps ONE person....then that is a magical and meaningful thing.....and so much good will come from a terrible situation. If you are reading this, and you are going through a terrible situation, no matter what it may be, God is there. Trust in Him, with all of your heart. Know that He wants to help you. He wants to stregthen you. He feels your pain. You are His precious child, and He wants to help you. Cry out to Him and allow Him to use your terrible situation, to bring about good. That doesnt mean that everything will happen just as we hope from then on out. But it does mean that GOOD will come out of the terrible situation. There will always be WHY and WHAT IF questions that pop into my mind every now and then. I have to remind myself that God is working. God is leading.....and good will come from this situation. I may never even see that good....but I know that it is happening. When I think of it from that perspective, suddenly, it doesnt seem so bad. All that we have had happen....all of the pain and loss...all of the health issues....all of the tears....all of the worry.....all of the stress.....all of the confusion.....all of the shots and medications.....ALL OF IT. Suddenly it just doesnt seem so bad. When I think about the fact that God will use this situation for GOOD, if I trust in Him and I follow Him, it is suddenly so bearable. Without God, I cannot do this. With God? I can do it....and with a smile on my face.
At the end of the sermon today, while the preacher was saying a prayer, I found tears running down my face. I know that God was talking to me. He was telling me that I had come full circle through this whole thing. I have gone from looking at this whole experience with tears, loss, and feeling anger when everyone said "everything happens for a reason", to looking at it with happiness, hope, and love. I see that God is working. I know that He is using this story for good. Though I have lost so much through this whole ordeal, I feel like I have gained so much more. I have never grown more as a mother, as a wife, and as a Christian, than I have in the last year. This experience is strengthening my walk with Christ....and that is something meaningful.
here are some verses that I fonud to be especially comforting
Romans 8:28
"We know that in everything, God works for the good of those that love him and work for His purpose".
Psalm 55:22
"Cast your worries upon the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous fall".
Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all of your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all ofyour ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path".

UPDATE 11-8-10

I got a postivie result today, so that is good news. That means that my immune system is strong enough to handle the treatments that the dr is wanting to do. So, I started my medications and my injections today. I have been doing the candida diet since Saturday, and I can already tell a difference in my sinuses and my feeling sick. Praise God for leading me to a place where I can get help and heal!!